Personally, I think the original Ephron-spawned dimple-fest was horrifying enough, but this makes a nice counterpoint to Shining:

Horror movie trailer for Sleepless in Seattle.

It was on Boing Boing so I'm guessing you already saw it.

I'll bet this is super-old: How to Destroy the Earth

Mission Statement

For the purposes of what I hope to be a technically and scientifically accurate document, I will define our goal thus: by any means necessary, to change the Earth into something other than a planet. Any of the following forms could represent success: two or more planets; any number of smaller asteroids; a dust cloud; a more exotic object such as a quantum singularity.

Patriot Search

Whether you are a normal searcher, someone trying to download illegal material, a terrorist looking to build a bomb, or just hunting porn, we at Patriot Search welcome you!

Our mission is to provide the best possible search engine to you while at the same time, making sure the government is informed should you search for something obscure, illegal, or unpatriotic.

Instead of letting the government waste tax money by going through complicated procedures to get user and search data from Yahoo, MSN, Ask Jeeves or Google, users of Patriot Search make sure their queries end up right where they belong – in the databases of the government and its various agencies.

Via Eyeteeth (You're probably better off just going there.)

Protrude, Flow

Japanese interactive art installation involving magnetic fluids. Be sure to watch a video if you can.

There's a whale in the Thames



No panic on the streets of London, tho'.

Update: Sadly, attempts to transport the whale to safety resulted in its death. Y'know, if I was some kind of right-wing tosser, I bet I could use this incident as an example of the destructive effect of the culture of dependence that stems from an over-reliance on government help; at least, as it applies to whales.

An International Catalogue of Superheroes

Stone me! I never realised the bloke responsible for Things My Girlfriend And I Have Argued About is also involved in another vaguely humourous net project called The Weekly. Well, stap me vitals!

Incidentally, "those" of you who read this shortly after I put it up will realise I'm a sodding liar when it comes to the posting date. What you gonna do about it, eh? Eh?

It's never too late to read So You've Decided To Be Evil.

Here's an intriguing FlickR pool - supposedly photos of people taken the moment they first glimpse the famously obscene net-legend picture known by its original web address of "goatse.cx". It's a pity the Guinness Book of Records people don't have a category for Most Famous Rectum. Or maybe it isn't.

Digest of movie monologues

Ten Most Beautiful Scientific Experiments
via Interconnected

The Cthulhu Circus

The comments from the guy who originally put these on his LiveJournal site about why he then took them down are interesting too.

Y'know, I did it to amuse myself and the few people on my friends list who dug the humor and added themselves to the community. I didn't want a fuckload of eyes on it, I don't need to be worrying about lawyers coming after me, and I myself was not the fucking thing's biggest fan in the first place. You take a cartoon and you stick someone else's words under it big deal. Not what I really wish to put energy into, become notorious for, or catch legal bullets for.

Fame can be such a burden.

Ever wondered if The Shining would have been better as a heart-warming family dramedy? Wonder no more.

Trailer (Quicktime Movie)

Funniest goddamn thing I have ever seen.

Many adorable photographs of adorable creatures, and links to other collections of adorable photographs of adorable creatures, can be found at Cute Overload. Flip through a few pages of this and in no time at all the angry voices in your head will stop telling you to expend your rage and frustration by burning things, and instead suggest you turn to more life-affirming projects, possibly involving burning things.

Back in the day, World Domination Softdrinks Incorporated created a commercial tie-in site for their brand Fanta Shokata, in which you could add captions to scenes from bad Bollywood flicks. That site - and all the films thus created - is lost to the ether, but now there is BombayTV which works on the same principle. The site is in French; I guess you'll have to use your noggin.

Oh, and Happy New Year! Or, as I like to say, "Happy Let's Hope This Year Won't Be As Astonishingly Crappy As The Last One". Or "Let's Pretend", for you glass-half-empty types.

Pimp My Nutcracker

More Christmas-related violence

About 40 men in ill-fitting Father Christmas costumes ran around Auckland vandalising or stealing property, and throwing bottles, police say.

Two security guards were injured and three of the men were arrested.

A police spokesman described it as "fairly average behaviour" from "an organised group of idiots".

That spokesman's a keeper.

Fuckchristmas.org

That’s right, that Yuletide cheer you’re spreading? Those “Christmas” traditions? They’re not just like Pagan rituals, they fucking are Pagan rituals. Yule? It’s the holiday celebrating the rebirth of the Sun god Mithra in . . . guess when? Go on – guess. Late December. What a weird coincidence. Practically the whole thing is ripped off from the fucking Druids. Twelve days? Check. Exchanging gifts? Check. Mistletoe? Check. And you’d better fucking believe that those decorated trees that Gibson and Co. are so bent out of shape over are as Pagan as the Rune and Crystal Shack at Pentagramfest 2005. You might as well be building miniature fucking Stonehenges in your den.

And don’t you read your own goddamn Bibles? Jesus was born when? In the middle of winter? Lot of Shepherds out watching their flocks around that time of year in Bethlehem? No, because they’d be freezing their fucking asses off. Tell you what – y’all go figure out which one of the different Bible stories about the birth of Baby Jesus® you want to believe, and then we’ll argue about whether it fucking happened like that or not.

These paragraphs chosen more or less at random. All the others are just as good.

Sweee-eet! Samorost has a sequel.

Said George Orwell, if you have difficulty getting up in the morning, hide your alarm clock on the far side of the room behind large heavy items of furniture, or consider the words of Marcus Aurelius:

In the morning when thou risest unwillingly, let this thought be present- I am rising to the work of a human being. Why then am I dissatisfied if I am going to do the things for which I exist and for which I was brought into the world? Or have I been made for this, to lie in the bed-clothes and keep myself warm? - But this is more pleasant.- Dost thou exist then to take thy pleasure, and not at all for action or exertion? Dost thou not see the little plants, the little birds, the ants, the spiders, the bees working together to put in order their several parts of the universe? And art thou unwilling to do the work of a human being, and dost thou not make haste to do that which is according to thy nature?

Well, now you can tell both George Orwell and Marcus Aurelius to go straight to Hell and burn, because someone's invented an alarm clock that flies.

Many sleepers experience that after they turn off the alarm clock they go on sleeping. One thing that sometimes wakes you up at night and prevents you from sleeping is the mosquito or blowfly when flying around your room. The Blowfly alarm clock works like a Blowfly. At the desired time it flies off from it's cage and starts flying and making sound around you. The only way to stop it is to wake up catch it and put it back in the cage.

I guess my idea for spikes that slowly grow out of the mattress is still ahead of its time.

Go see Optical Illusions Etc Blog, which led me to Zoneflash (en Francais).

Now, this is my kind of Christmas tradition.

Vandals have set light to a giant straw goat in Sweden - an event that has happened so frequently it has almost become a Christmas tradition.

It's the 22nd time the goat has gone up in smoke since merchants in Gavle, 150km north of Stockholm, began erecting it to mark the holiday season.

Police spokeswoman Margareta Olander said officers received a call just after 9pm to report that the goat was ablaze.

"In just a couple of minutes only a sooty wooden skeleton remained," she said.

There were no immediate suspects, but Olander said that one of two men seen running from the scene was wearing a Father Christmas mask.

Somebody notify Bill O'Reilly immediately!

Wolfram Tones

Stephen Wolfram published A New Kind of Science in 2002... the core of A New Kind of Science is the idea of exploring a new abstract universe: a "computational universe" of simple programs... Wolfram shows how remarkably simple programs in his "computational universe" capture the essence of the complexity--and beauty--of many systems in nature.

WolframTones works by taking simple programs from Wolfram's computational universe, and using music theory and Mathematica algorithms to render them as music. Each program in effect defines a virtual world, with its own special story--and WolframTones captures it as a musical composition.

One Red Paperclip Starting with said paperclip, this Canadian gentleman aims to trade his way up to a house. So far he's up to one famous skidoo.

Everybody's linking to Science!

And here's the Samorost game, if you've been missing it.

The Smaller Picture

The collective consciousness is attempting to create a...

Exquisite Corpses

Game of folded paper that consists in having a sentence or a drawing composed by several persons, each ignorant of the preceding collaboration...

My brain hurts.

Another FlickR pool: Camera Tossing

And, yes, I could have written "A Bunch of Tossers". But you know what? Some of us have standards.

And, please, people, stick to the rules. Rules are what make fun fun.

And there's more:

Amazing Circles | Silhouette | Silhouettes | The Skies Above | Bubble Mirrors | Disturbing Small Animals* | Most Difficult | Fish Eye Lens | High Speed Photography | Panoramic | Liq.uid | Double Exposure | Motion Blurred | Public Windows Crashes | Puddle Reflections | Underwater | Window Weather | Slow Shutter Speed | Indecent Exposure (Underloved Photos) | Long Exposure | Multiple Exposure | _ (Minimalism) | Sparklers | Ablazin' (Fire and Fireworks) | Your Shadow on the Ground | Lights and Shadows | Shadows | Natural Light | Complementary Colors | The Colors of Nature | Color Fields | Neon Lights | Atomic Number 10 (More Neon) | Colored Lights At Night | Real Macro

* Adjective not verb.